The Restless Poet

How dare you! I finally erase what I had left of you in me and you decide to infiltrate my dreams again. My mind was buzzing this morning trying to figure out why I was so deliriously agitated and couldn’t put my finger on it until the scene came back with you written all over it.

I was engaged in a joyous slumber, one I rarely get (even in my nighttime visions) and I hear a knock at the door. I waited for one of the boys to answer, but they left it to me. I wasn’t expecting you. I thought I would never see you again. Who would be appearing in the middle of the night, or at my door for that matter? I rarely have any company come to the house. What struck me as odd is I was wearing pajamas from thirty years ago; right down to the color and pattern – an exact match. I was so tired, I didn’t even put my glasses on and stumbled toward the door.

I regretted my decision not to grab my eyes as I probably shouldn’t be opening a door in the middle of the night without checking who was there first, but I had an eerie calm about it. I asked who was there but I just heard a throaty chuckle, one I recognized but thought not possible. I tried peering through the window but it was only a mad blur. Turn and go back to bed? My curiosity got the better of me.

I swung the door open, not sure how I was going to approach this. I needn’t worry, you and your glamorous presence took care of that for me. You asked to come in but didn’t wait for an answer, just a brilliant smile smoothed across your face as if charm can get you everywhere. Apparently it does. No explanation, no conversation. You strode toward the kitchen as if you lived here. The best part was that I found comfort in that. Not surprise, not irritation…calm. I liked it.

I asked why you were at my house so late, but you just said that you had been out and was passing by my house. You must have been hungry from all of your galavanting because you headed straight to the refrigerator. I could only see half of you as your head was hidden by the door as you sifted through any offerings I might have in the midnight hours. If you had asked, I would have made you a full meal.

Your conversation was casual as if we had been chatting on the phone before you stopped by for a visit. Confusing to me, but I wasn’t sure if I should interrupt or just be happy I had you in my presence. I stayed quiet, listening to you ramble on about what you had been up to since I last saw you. I’m not sure you even took a breath. It was as if you didn’t want to stop talking in case I decided to interrogate you. I wouldn’t have though. I didn’t want you to leave. I would have done anything to have kept you there. My soul needed your presence. It has been missing for too long now. An indescribable sadness when a piece of your heart is missing.

It wasn’t to last though, a shift in the temperature stirred me out of the warmth of your voice. Fading away as my eyes drifted open. My only question I have now, “Is this the last visit? Every time I think we’ve had our final goodbye, you appear, knocking the wind out of me. I’ll have to gather myself and try to find an answer or perhaps I don’t need an answer. Maybe, I just appreciate the surprises and let it bring me the little joy I do find in my life.